brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
What a dumb baby whore.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
