i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
North Korea, Best Korea!
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
