I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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