so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
