Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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