I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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