You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
