Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
