ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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