"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I have tasted many bathrooms
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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