can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
