You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
