My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
You are a genius and a whore.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
