Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
