I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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