The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
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