Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
How external is "for external use only"?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
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