Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize