Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I need to align my fucking chakras
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