Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(914): View more from New York

she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.

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(858): View more from California

Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.

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(513): View more from Ohio

This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick

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(303): View more from Colorado

It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.

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(775): View more from Nevada

He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b

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(805): View more from California

You left your phone here

(805): View more from California

Wait...

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