Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I need a burrito and a hug.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
ok first of all what the fuck
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
