I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I want to fling myself into the sun
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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