I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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