let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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