This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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