O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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