AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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