Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize