I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize