ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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