I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize