So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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