I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
