Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
