Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
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