My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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