Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Randomize
