no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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