idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
