I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
only if we run a train.
done.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize