OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
