I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
