I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
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