dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
