you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Someone signed my nipple.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
