please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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