Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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