you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
