Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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