love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
